


paramnesia.

by sensesonfire



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst, Angst and Feels, Emotional Hurt, F/F, Hurt No Comfort, Light Angst, Lowercase, No Plot/Plotless, POV Second Person, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-12
Updated: 2020-02-12
Packaged: 2021-02-27 22:21:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 355
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22673221
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sensesonfire/pseuds/sensesonfire
Summary: i want to love you, but i do not know how.
Relationships: Mikasa Ackerman/Annie Leonhart
Comments: 1
Kudos: 31





	paramnesia.

you are here again, drowning in feelings you did not ask to have. or you did actually, you just second guess too much. it has been weeks since it first started and you lied to yourself, saying you were just projecting things, fantasizing. goddamn fool, you were _not_ imagining things. all of this—it’s too real.

you know it the moment you look at icy blue eyes and wonder how would it be to put soft feelings into them, to rub some love in that steeling glaze and how would it feel if it was directed at you. starting to fill your heart with false hope, you indulge once again your memories to remember the broken bones and shredded words of two people who did not know how to love each other properly.

close your eyes. take a deep breath. laugh without any emotion behind it. it is just too painful, in the end.

“hey,” you reach out, touch her left cheekbone, the skin is cold yet soft.

“hm?” comes the response, indifferent.

it reaches the tip of your tongue, but it is too sweet – you never liked sweets, you dreaded them a lot.

_it seems like… I have fallen in love with you and I cannot fall out of it, it is too stressing, please put your armor down for once and let me in, I promise to take care of you._

“nothing,” and you let your hand fall on your lap again, getting up right after.

you leave like it does not matter – but it does – and she let you leave while you pretend it does not hurt – _it fucking does_ – and you smile despite yourself.

you are hurting inside and it is eating you up, chewing your brain out, even when you try to sugarcoat it. you sense danger yet you cannot escape – it is too late; the storm is already here.

a faint golden light flickers in front of you followed by icy blue. you cannot tell mirage from reality apart. she smiles, tiny yet there.

you soften your gaze. it is not what you want, but she is still there.


End file.
